*supervises valet loading Louis Vuitton trunks*
The Hamptons. That glorious stretch of Long Island where Manhattan’s elite pretend to relax while competing in an unspoken contest of “whose beach house has the better ocean view.” As someone who has observed countless Housewife migrations to this particular habitat, I can tell you exactly what gets packed — and what gets worn approximately once before being returned.
The Essentials
The Caftan: No Hamptons weekend is complete without at least three caftans. One for the beach, one for the pool, one for the inevitable “casual dinner” that is anything but casual. Camilla is the brand of choice, though I’ve seen acceptable alternatives from lesser labels.
The White Jeans: A Hamptons uniform requirement. L’Agence and AGOLDE dominate, though I’ve personally observed Luann de Lesseps making a strong case for Frame.
The Sunglasses Collection: Minimum four pairs. One statement, one classic, one sporty, and one “I don’t want to be recognized at the farmer’s market” pair. Tom Ford and Celine lead the pack.
The Affordable Alternatives
For those working with more modest budgets — and there’s no shame in that, truly — visit our Steals section for curated alternatives that capture the essence without the expense.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to supervise the packing of my own trunks. We leave for Montauk at dawn.